Adventures in the Kingdom: Reflecting Forward on 2016

Five Christmas’…

Five New Year celebrations…

Five years of birthdays…

Have been missed.

Five year’s worth of life events - marriages, divorces, separations, estrangement, boyfriends (not my own of course), breakups, babies, moves, sicknesses and deaths – have been missed.

Five years.

It hasn't been easy. I wouldn't trade the experiences, connections and adventures that I've had for anything as they've shown me more of my King, who I am and how wonderfully He and I work together when I obey. But it has been far from easy. If you had told me six years ago that I would find myself living overseas as an expat with no idea what the next step of my journey would hold, I don't think I would've believed you. I certainly didn't anticipate this life. But faithfulness to the Lord is to live a life of adventure, I've found. (Even for those who don't country hop and stay in the same place, there is an adventure for you too.) Someday I pray that adventure will include a family and perhaps even a stable home, but today I'm reflecting on the adventures that have already been had. So many more than can be recounted here.

In June of 2011 I left America to go to China, thinking it would only be for one year.

In 2012 I thought that I would stay in China for just one more year.

In 2013 I obeyed and stayed for another year, but was beginning to sense that the end wasn’t in sight just yet.

In 2014 God began preparing me to move – but not back to America.

In 2015 my wonderful Father had me pack up my life into two suitcases and two boxes, move, once again, to another country, culture and community.

As 2016 approaches, I’m preparing for another wild ride.

This may look like a lot but when you consider that this
is all two people own aside from two boxes being
sent by mail, it's not much.

This time last year I was still in China; enjoying the blessings and surprises that came with living in China. But I was also wrapping my head around the word that I had just received to “go” yet again. By Springtime 2015, the command was unmistakable, “GO” to Germany. In July, I was on a plane to Germany with no idea what God had in store for me when I landed – and never could I have imagined. I remember as the plane was descending into Frankfurt airport, praying quietly, “God, I sure hope you know what you’re doing because I most certainly do not.”

But He has been faithful.

When we needed a place to call home, He was faithful to provide a place that was more and better than we could have imagined. He even added the much desired and much prayed for and believed for community that we so needed and desired.

When I had no idea where finances were going to come from, He provided for our needs.

When it looked like there was no way we would be able to acquire visas to stay, He provided the favor and the means to do just that.

When I had no idea where to begin getting involved in ministry, He provided the contacts to open the door to active ministry all over the city.

When I broke my toe, He healed it. Just ‘cause He can. *smile*

When I needed church support, He brought it (in the most unlikely of places)

When I was sick, He Healed.

When I was struggling with the goodness of God, He was patient with His child and reminded me that He is a Good Father, ALWAYS.

YES, my God has been faithful in every way this year (as He has been in the past). And I am thankful for the hard times, the struggles, the challenges that I’ve faced that have brought me closer to Him and taught me more of who He is.

Looking forward to the coming year, I’m excited to see what God has in store, though I confess that there is still lots to discover. I will continue on in my working/assisting with SFC in various aspects, including worship, teaching and relationship building. I will continue on in my language study for as long as necessary (likely another 6 months at least). I will continue to seek to build connections at the local Prayer House, as well as the local body that I meet with regularly.

Yet, in the midst of the consistency, I’m also seeking specific direction to become clearer in the coming weeks/months in regards to ministry, schooling, trips to the US and financial provision. As it is, I’m seeking and living off of financial support given. And will likely continue to do so for at least the next year (legally I am unable to work on my current visa; depending on how God leads in areas of ministry will dictate whether I seek work after language or continue on in this new phase of life). I would urge you again to pray and consider giving a small amount (maybe only $20) monthly to assist in the basic living expenses that need to be covered. One of the many blessings that has come in recently is that I’ve been accepted as an “agent” of International Christian Mission Services (ICMS) which is a 501(c)(3) organization and enables those giving to me as an overseas missionary to receive tax receipts. This is especially good news for the churches that I've been in contact with. A BIG answer to prayer.

2016 will be a year of excitement and challenge! It will be year of constant change and the unexpected. But it will also be a year of blessing and declaration. A year of fulfillment, and a wonderful year of growing with our glorious and wonderful Father. This is what I do know.

As you prepare to enter into a new year, a new season, perhaps even a new chapter, I pray that our God would bless you greatly in this coming new year and that 2016 would be a year of drawing closer to our Lord as children of God as well as the Bride of Christ. God bless!!

Community of Believers

So last weekend, we (SFC) got to enjoy our first annual Winter retreat!!! Woohoo!!

It was definitely an adventure! =]

Truth be told, there was little that seemed to quite go the way that we had expected or anticipated. BUT, the goal of the retreat was to bond and build relationships with each other, to learn more about spiritual growth and get away and worship through life together for a few days. And THAT goal was accomplished.

Game time after the first session

We arrived at the house to find no gas for the heaters, less than clean rooms and most of the beds had been written on in ways that only teenagers away from home can leave memories behind for others to be embarrassed by. And I arrived with an upset stomach that had me in bed most of the first evening.
But God in His goodness restored and calmed the storms in my stomach and allowed me to enjoy and really glean from the rest of the weekend while getting good quality time in with others there. We were able to have someone come and fix the heaters and we got a fire going and had a great time huddling in the warm community room while we learned together, shared together, ate together, prayed together, and laughed together. Outside, it was too warm for snow but there was still enough snow on the ground from the previous week's cold days that those who wanted to were still able to enjoy the snow without freezing to death (a very important grace for the Floridians present).

Learning about the different spiritual disciplines

One thing that I loved the most about this retreat was the concept of coming together with the intention of learning and growing together. Something that we've really been focusing a lot on with SFC this semester is the concept of discipleship and how thats done in community. This weekend, I felt like we had the opportunity to come together as a community, as the first disciples did when they gathered around Jesus, and hear the Word of God being taught.
I had the privilege of sharing about what it means to worship in community this weekend and the conclusion of that came in recognizing that worship is an attitude of reverence and awe towards God. And when we come together with that same heart attitude, our actions and reactions towards each other become acts of worship to Him, regardless of what we're doing. We can be celebrating or mourning, praying and singing or playing games, sharing testimony or sitting together in silence, no matter what it is that we do, when our hearts are set on Christ (which is what the process of discipleship does to our hearts), we can worship Him in doing life together. A.W. Tozer says that one hundred pianos tuned to each other will lead to disharmony, whereas one hundred pianos all tuned to the same master piano will all be in tune with each other. We are the pianos. Jesus is the master that we need to be in tune to. This weekend was a great time to practice that. Such a blessing.

In other news, as a group, we also had a chance to go and enjoy the Freiburg Christmas market together and had a great time eating great food and looking through all the stalls. THIS was just too much fun!!

Thank you to all of you who have been faithfully praying for the work that is being done here in SFC, Freiburg, and in Germany. God has been amazingly faithful. And for the students as well as the leaders, we have had the beautiful blessing of witnessing the working and orchestrating of God throughout this semester. And there's more to come!!

Brief Recap in Pictures

There's really no way that I could share everything that's been going on here over the last two months in just one or two posts. Seasons have changed, schedules have picked up considerably. Relationships are growing and God is ever-faithful. Here's a few pictures of the many blessings He's provided.

Special blessings: our dear friend and "angel" - our first friend in Freiburg. Here we had a chance to spend time fellowshipping together, bike rides and good food and lots of laughter. 

Beautiful dusk while waiting to get into the building for our weekly SFC meeting

Pre-meeting SFC prayer time

There's frost on the ground!!!

Great turn out for Coffee-To-Go at the teacher's college. Lots of fun and lots of great conversations.

A picture of Autumn

SFC Thanksgiving Dinner

Prayer requests:
1) SFC retreat this weekend (Dec 4-6). Pray that hearts would be receptive to what God is speaking to them. Pray for the servants, that they would be properly prepared to give their best to these students. Pray for a time of joy and fellowship and that relationships would continue to grow deeper.

2) Busy schedules. With the holiday season now here, I'm sure you know very well how easy it is to get overwhelmed with the amount of things to get done. It's no different here. :) SFC has about three weeks left until the semester ends and we take a break until January, but that does not mean that we're slowing down at all! We've got loads of events and meetings still scheduled to take care of and that doesn't include the personal lives of all of us involved. With everything going on, please pray for wisdom and discipline to work and rest when needed. Strength to fight off illnesses (our house has already been through a nasty bout of flu this past week), and patience and understanding towards each other with it's easy to get stressed and frustrated.

3) Remember the reason for the Season.
In everything that happens during this merry time of thanks and gifts, let us not forget the Supreme reason that we have to celebrate. I pray that you would have a chance to take some time to reflect on the miracle baby and His precious life that He gave for us.

Much love!!

Pray For Germany

Jo and I were invited to tag along on a trip to Karlsruhe about a week and half ago to participate in a day of worship and prayer at one of the local prayer houses. This was a real treat for many reasons, not the least of which meant a short road trip with a new but very dear friend and angel; but also it was especially exciting for me because it was an opportunity to both witness and participate in something that God is doing outside of Freiburg as well.

Within Freiburg, it's been wonderful to see the move of the Spirit around town. I meet random people who somehow within a conversation will inadvertently say something to the effect of, "It's really amazing what God is doing here right now." And I just smile at yet another affirmation of the word that God has spoken for Germany.
Within SFC (the ministry that I'm working with) has seen wonderful growth and enthusiasm, more than what even we, who walked in excited and convinced that God was going to do something amazing, had really anticipated. New people come almost every week and there's such a joy and familial atmosphere each week when we come together. Relationships are growing stronger and deeper, and to just put it simply, the "work" is a joy.

But back to Karlsruhe, we showed up to the location with our beloved *Angel and I was almost immediately struck by the amount of young people. And when I say 'young people', I don't mean 'young people' like I'm a young people. I mean 'young people' like teenagers - middle and highschoolers. There were most certainly adults there as well, many of whom I gathered were parents, but the majority of the 120+ crowd were under the age of 21. And I was struck by this.
Here we were spending our Saturday afternoon/evening at a prayer house for a time of worship, and here were large groups of young people willing to do the same right along side of us "old people".
My heart smiled. I was so encouraged to see the desire and willingness and fire of God that was moving among this generation.
This was only furthered by the fact that, with the exception of times of teaching and communion taking, the entire event was led by youth - which means it wasn't all an exceptionally put together event, but it was done with hearts that were willing and wanting to serve and grow.
My favorite moment of the evening was when we were all singing Christ Is Enough and I looked forward to the front of the room and I saw these two boys standing in the front, declaring with all of their hearts (and I was just standing behind them) this stand of faith. They're eleven and fourteen. And when these two were called up to the front to stand in for the many others their age that we were all praying for, they stood there and prayed right along with us.

What an amazing generation of young men and women God is bringing up in this beautiful country. I'm excited to be a witness. I'm excited to see what He's been and in the process of doing. I'm excited to be a part of this movement that is happening in Germany. Pray for Germany.

Answered Prayers

I've got three days until my three month anniversary of my arrival to Germany.

It's been 3 months.

THREE MONTHS!!!

Already.

It's really bizarre to me that three months have passed since my arrival here. There's just been so much happening that time has been a whirlwind around me. It seems like I only just arrived here, while at the same time it feels like I've been here for ages already.

I've seen God provide housing, provide relational connections, provide community, provide visas. He's moved hearts to help contribute financially. He's breathed peace into my weary soul and spoken rest over a mind in hyper speed. He's given favor in the sight of authorities and patient understanding when nothing makes sense.

God is good all the time.

All the time, God is good.

In three months I have watched God become even more real to me in daily life. Prayer and worship time has become even sweeter than I could have ever imagined. He has been my defender and avenger. My comfort and refuge. He has been my solace, He has been my joy.
Everything points back to Him!

Just prior to three months ago I began asking God to bring me to a place where there was only Him; a place where I could hear His voice clearly and wouldn't be afraid to follow. I asked Him for deeper intimacy. I asked Him for growth. I asked Him to take me beyond the place where I was. I asked for more of Him.

God is a living God who hears and who answers! He is a God who cares and takes care of His children.
You can trust Him when He asks for your heart, your trust, your life.

The Seen Unseen Blessings

Do Not Be Anxious

22 And he said to his disciples, “Therefore I tell you, do not be anxious about your life, what you will eat, nor about your body, what you will put on. 23 For life is more than food, and the body more than clothing. 24 Consider the ravens: they neither sow nor reap, they have neither storehouse nor barn, and yet God feeds them. Of how much more value are you than the birds! 25 And which of you by being anxious can add a single hour to his span of life?[a] 26 If then you are not able to do as small a thing as that, why are you anxious about the rest? 27 Consider the lilies, how they grow: they neither toil nor spin,[b]yet I tell you, even Solomon in all his glory was not arrayed like one of these. 28 But if God so clothes the grass, which is alive in the field today, and tomorrow is thrown into the oven, how much more will he clothe you, O you of little faith! 29 And do not seek what you are to eat and what you are to drink, nor be worried. 30 For all the nations of the world seek after these things, and your Father knows that you need them. 31 Instead, seek his[c]kingdom, and these things will be added to you.

I just can't seem to get away from this passage/concept lately. It's a good thing though. :) It means that I'm constantly being reminded of Who it is that I rely on for all things, and what my main purpose is to be. This is especially important to me right now as I'm settling into a new life, a new place with new people for a new season. God has been gracious to answer many questions that have been floating around in my heart in recent months in specific ways, but He hasn't answered all of them in detail. To those "unanswered" questions He seems to continue to refer back to this passage of scripture - "remember your calling right now, and trust Me", He says.

This isn't necessarily a new concept for me. My trust in Him has reached new levels of faith, trust and obedience, for sure, but there has been an element of trusting Him to take care of me throughout recent years. The beauty of it all is that the recent years of trusting and seeing Him come through in provision for things that I didn't even know that I needed makes it much easier to trust Him now when I'm literally looking to Him for daily supply.

The thing is, there's this "natural" human tendency in me to constantly look at my life through the lens of the outsider; to make my decisions and prepare any possible defense for though that might condemn or argue that I "don't suffer enough". That's not to say that people wish harm for me, but there seems to be a sense that "living for Christ", especially abroad, especially in missions, means that one must suffer with less: less finances, less material possession, less time for refreshment and relaxing, less..., less..., less....
I hear stories about people who are angry because people on the field are on "extravagant" vacations in some far away country, presumably with money allocated for mission work. And I think about the time that I was offered a [paid] trip to Thailand (from nearby China) and was able to have a true time of refreshment and encouragement in Abba after eight months of burnout. That trip was a blessing to my heart and my soul in so many ways. But for many, all that is known is that I went on vacation to Thailand.
Or how about the "big, modern, extravagant" houses that they live in that are seemingly way more than what's necessary?
Last year, I was blessed to have a home that was extravagant. But it was a gift from God, from the amount of space to the price of rent to ability to use it for the very things that He'd put on my heart to do - to serve and welcome and refresh people in a comfortable home environment.

These are just a few of the things that I've heard over the years about how field workers are misunderstood. I hear them and I think, "but what if that person were able to share their heart about that thing that you're judging? Would it change your perspective at all to hear that God is the one behind the extravagant provision?"

And so here I am, in "extravagant" Germany, living in yet another, very nice house, with wonderful people and a bike to get around on, and I find myself thinking, what would/do people say about my life right now? Do they see God? Do they know that it was God who introduced us to these wonderful people in a way that ONLY He could? Do they think that I'm wasting time when I answer the "what are you doing these days?" question with, "lots of reading, praying and preparing my heart to be sensitive to Holy Spirit during the coming term"?
Then I go to my Abba with all of these questions and he refers me back to the above passage. He reminds me that it's Him who's been taking care of me all of this time, it's He that I'm here to serve and obey, and it's He that will hold me in His "righteous right hand". So I will not be weary, for He is my God (Isa 41:10).

I read a quote by Bonhoeffer recently that said, "The life of discipleship is not the hero-worship we would pay to a good master, but obedience to the Son of God." It's easy for me to wish that everyone could see the way I see; that I could explain and argue and defend myself from the ideas that float around, but then I'm convicted for allowing people to be my Master. I serve only one Master - that is the Lord Jesus Christ.
When I'm tempted to look at things through the worlds perspective, I remember these words and shift my focus back to God. Looking though the worlds perspective is discouraging but I find my heart is filled with hope when I trust in the Father and rest in Him. So that is where I will stay. I will continue to watch Him work and pray that the eyes of the world around me will be opened as well to see the glorious works of His hands.

The Brokenness of Being Abroad

Living abroad is exciting.

You get to see new places. Experience new cultures. Meet wonderful people. And if you’re really lucky, you get to see the amazing works of God all over in the world.

Knowing that this is exactly where God has called me to be right now, I love my life.

I love the adventures.

I love the stories.

I love God.

More and more everyday.

But the truth is that living abroad is hard. Living abroad hurts. And living abroad is far from easy.

When you’re living abroad everything is foreign. EVERYTHING.

From food to housing to culture to transportation to language, everything is different. Even in cultures that might be similar to your home culture, it’s still different enough to remind you at the end of the day that this is not where you came from.

When you’re living abroad people are far away.

The sad fact is that living abroad means leaving behind lifelong friends and the closest of family members. The people who [you] promised to write every week; [you] don’t. The people you used to talk to every day suddenly seem to have disappeared at times. You miss out on life events that you never would have dreamed of missing – ie. Weddings, pregnancies, babies, graduations, family reunions, birthdays, the list goes on. The big stuff, the small stuff, it all becomes even more significant when you’re in another country.
Sure, you meet great people while living abroad. God provides amazing community and you find that you’ve all managed to create your own weird little family culture that somehow (divinely) works. But even then, the reality is that as expats living abroad, people are transient. They come. They go. And you learn that goodbyes are never far away.

When you’re living abroad nothing is as easy as it would be at home.

Whether you’re dealing with visas and banks or just navigating the processes of a new culture, it’s common to briefly think, “at home I would have just _______ and then ______.” But you’re not at home. And even the easiest of days can be an incredible expenditure of emotional energy that leaves you exhausted when you hit the bed.

The reality is that when God calls us to leave the comfort of home to go “to the land that I will show you”, it’s far from easy. It’s not always fun. And those back home rarely get to witness the tears and brokenness that is experienced from the other side of an ocean or border.

The stress of not knowing what the next step is going to be, or how this need is going to be met can be overwhelming.

The pain of feeling misunderstood by those you most want to run to for comfort is difficult to be put into words.

The brokenness of knowing that your absence is a source of hurt in the lives of those you care about is heart-wrenching.

Those of us who have been called away from home, security, friends and familiar may happily walk away seemingly oblivious to what we’re walking away from. We’re not.

If we fail to maintain regular contact, we ask for grace as we extend the same grace to you.

When you see all the Facebook photos of all the fun and wonderful things that we’re getting to experience, remember that there are hours and days of pain and stress and fighting that aren’t being broadcast to the world. We’re human too.

And when we ask for help – of whatever kind that may be – please don’t assume that we’re actually talking to someone else, or that someone else will fill the need. Because the reality is, it’s really easy to feel alone when your closest loved ones are 7,774 miles away. No matter where you are or who’s with you.

An Altar of Praise

A week ago Jo and I walked into a church feeling pretty beat down and hopeless. 

We were desperate.

Desperate for a word from God.

Desperate to make a friend.

Desperate to keep our heads above water to keep from sinking.

We needed to find a place to live. We needed to find a job. We needed a community to surround and support us. We needed to see God walking before us.

So we went to a church (that she and I had each stumbled across separately and wanted to visit) and got there 30 minutes early.

30 minutes of silence.

No welcomes.

No connections.

Just watching as everyone else came in and began sharing with each other.

Then…just as service was about to start, a lady came and sat next to us. She was kind and introduced her self and we got to talk for a moment. And then the service began.

And God reminded me that when all else is lost I can, and WILL, praise His name.

He reminded me of every promise He gave me in Xiamen, and I reclaimed them again.

My Daddy reminded me that he’s “never failed, and [He] won’t start now.”
And at the end of it all, I was reminded that Yahweh is worthy of ALL the glory and ALL the honor and ALL the praise in EVERYTHING.

God is good… all the time. And all the time God is good.

So then after the service is over, the lady next to us starts asking us questions about why we’re here and what we need. Before we knew it she was introducing us to people who could possibly help us out and had given us her contact information so that we could get together again later in the week.
We walked out of church feeling full and blessed and walking on water again, knowing that our God was still walking with us.

On Monday I received an email reply from a local student ministry leader that I’d contacted the previous week. He (and his wife) very warmly and graciously welcomed us to Germany and invited us to dinner at their home Friday night. (Did I mention that they were in the middle of packing up their home and moving to a new location?) We also heard of a bike (plus necessary accessories) that was available in our price range. (A bike is a necessary and practical form of transportation here in Freiburg.)

On Tuesday, we received word from our friend we’d met on Sunday that if we weren’t able to find a place to live before our time at our current location was up, that she and her housemates would be happy to welcome us for a few weeks as we continued figuring things out.

On Wednesday we were able to purchase the bike, with no issues and mostly brand new or mostly new accessories. We were also able to attend the church’s midweek service (which is in German) and made another friend.

Thursday, Jo and I decided to make use of our new bike (and a borrowed one from our current host) and visit a nearby lake for a swim and some sun-time. We then got to meet up with our Sunday church friend for some exploring the town and just getting to know more about each other. It was a great time of blessing and encouragement.

On Friday, we went to dinner at this couple’s house and discovered that this meeting was by no means coincidental. It just so happens that the house that they’re moving to, has a shared apartment attached to it (cuz shared living is the thing to do here in Germany) that happened to be in need of some tenants. Three bedrooms to be exact. And the rent is better than we could imagine. After several hours of conversation about all sorts of things – life, passions, intentions, God-stories – there was just an overwhelming sense of God’s divine purpose in this meeting. We even left with clothes and house things that we’d been praying about.

Saturday we went back to the lake (which after two record hot 100 degree days, was significantly warmer than it was on Thursday), and then went to look at the potential apartment. Once again, we see God answering specific prayers. Tomorrow (Sunday), we’ll give them our [yes] answer.

People said we probably couldn’t find housing in a week – but God can.

People said that a place with two rooms for both Jo and I would be hard to find – but God found it.

People said that community is what you make of what you have – God has provided a community to surround us in support and encouragement.

You can’t buy new jackets and shoes with money you don’t have – but God can provide them.

You can’t buy a bike without funds – but God can provide the [exact] means to do so.

To all of you who have questioned and wondered at the logic of moving somewhere without a plan and “blaming” God, I say, My God will not fail.

To all who think that we’re crazy, I say, I’m crazy about my Jesus, and that’s who I follow.

And to all of you who have supported this transition through prayer, encouragement and financial giving, I say, God bless you for your faithfulness to the work that He is doing and thank you from the bottom of my heart.

I realize that some of you might fit more than one of those categories up there =], and that’s ok. I am well aware that this move was not practical, but I am convinced it was right. I’m fully aware that it’s crazy, but I know that I serve a BIG, crazy God. And I know that asking for financial support after the fact looks like poor planning, but my only defense is God. I would/will not wait to obey on the basis of financial means and support. My God will supply all of [my] needs according to His riches in glory in Christ Jesus (Phil 4:19). (He may just use you. :})

I serve an AWESOME God!!!