Worship is….Part 2: The Daniel Fast

I was reading through the rest of 2 Chronicles 29, and as I got further down past verse 11 (confused? see previous post), the scriptures explain the cleansing process that took place by the Levites as they prepared the Temple for rededication. As I read it, I could feel God saying, “you need to consecrate yourself and get ready.”

How?

I’d been talking to God about doing a fast. I didn’t know how long. I didn’t know what I would be fasting. I don’t even think I really had a clear goal in mind – which was why I was seeking direction about how to fast.

This was it. I suddenly had an idea for the purpose and length of time. For two weeks I would fast with the intention of purifying and cleansing my life and heart in a way that would prepare me for the call that God was laying down before me. So I mapped it out. Each day of the fast would be a focus on different areas – i.e. breaking chains, past hurts, present goals, future desires, forgiveness, heart issues, etc. Through another process, I decided on a Daniel fast - eating only fruits and vegetables and nuts.

I've done fasts before. But always they have been solely focused on God alone and trying desperately to ignore myself. This fast was vastly different in approach and feelings because I was intentionally focusing on myself. But I wasn't just focusing on myself, I was exposing myself to God and allowing him complete control. After 10+ years of following Christ, I can honestly say that was an experience I had never experienced before.

Most days, when I would open my journal to see what the days focus was, God would reveal something wholly different than what I had anticipated when I wrote it all out. My journal was flooded with scriptures each day and the promises of God began to take on a whole new meaning in my life; a whole new life of their own. I found myself seeing things from a whole new perspective and strongholds and temptations that I’ve struggled with for years were suddenly broken.

I felt free.

I felt light.

I felt confident in who I was in Christ.

And I had the assurance that anything God called me to do, I could do in the power of His Holy Spirit.

The two weeks I spent doing the Daniel fast, was a complete shift in my world. It was as if my world we suddenly flipped on it’s side and everything was incredibly clearer.
I know that concept is completely wrong, but isn’t that just the way that God works?

But for all the wonderful things and feelings that I had about the changes that were being made in my life after the fast, God was just getting started. 

Worship Is….Part 1

I heard a great testimony yesterday about how God is a god who sees the future and prepares for it long before we’re ever aware of the need. With that in mind…when I say that this story began about eight months ago, I have no doubt that it actually began long before that through a whole other series of events.

God is Sovereign

Over every one. Over every thing. He is in control, always.

Back in April a couple of friends and I began a study group together that focused on inner healing – something that I knew that I was in need of. But as I began on this journey with them, I knew that in my own heart there was a sense of holding back and a need for more; both at the same time (I know it’s bizzare), and I was having a very hard time reconciling it. The study was good. It was reiterating things that God has been teaching and working in me for the last two years at least. But I had a hunger for something greater than a reminder. And I as I would pray over study time and scripture, I would feel restless and frustrated.

Until one night during my daily reading time, it suddenly hit me – literally. I was reading through 2 Chronicles 29, about King Hezekiah (who happens to be one of my favorite kings to read about) and suddenly it was like God knocked me in the head and said, “Did you catch that? It was for you. Read it again.” This is what it said:

“My sons, do not now be negligent, for the Lord has chosen YOU to stand in his presence, to minister to him and to be his minsters and make offerings to him.” (v 11, emphasis mine).

This was King Hezekiah talking to the Levites and the priests in the Temple after his decision to recommit the nation to God and His law. In that moment, it was God talking to me.

Something that I’ve known for a long time is that I have been called to lead people in worship. Something that God has been teaching me for at least the last year is that ‘leading people in worship’ means so much more than knowing how to put together a good music set and get them all to sing along.

About a month or two prior to this (I told you I would backtrack further J), I was having a conversation with some older friends, who I respect very much for their spiritual maturity, over dinner, and the position and role of a worship leader was brought up. It was one of the first times that I had ever heard the concept (in a clear, concise verbal form) that a worship leader is responsible for leading people to God with a purpose. We’re not just to get them to gates of His temple and then leave them there to hang out, but we’re to guide them in and “mediate”, so to speak, a conversation, an experience, an entrance into His presence with the purpose of receiving a bit of Him in us that will leave us forever changed.

(Note: I use that word ‘mediate” very loosely. I am well aware that Jesus is our mediator and make no attempts to state otherwise.)

Think on that concept for a moment….imagine if every time you entered into the presence of God you were eternally changed by that experience?

I'm pretty sure that's how it's supposed to be

As I was reading that verse in 2 Chronicles, this was confirmed to me more clearly. These were the leaders, organizers and responsible parties for worship services that took place at the Temple. And here, God was telling me that this too is my call, to stand in and be an example for the people to follow.

I continued reading through the chapter. A few verses down from 11, we read about what the Levites response was to Hezekiah’s exhortation. They consecrated and prepared themselves to cleanse the house of the Lord. In just over two weeks time, they got rid of all the impure things, the blasphemous idols that had been built up over the reign of King Ahaz, and had the temple ready to be rededicated to the Lord (v. 15-19).

God said, “you need to consecrate yourself and get ready.”

Three Years of Education

I lie down and slept; I awoke, for the Lord sustains me

- Ps 3:5

I will both lie down and sleep for you alone O Lord make me to dwell in safety.

- Ps 4:8

He will not allow your foot to slip; He who keeps you will not slumber - Ps 121: 3

After my first year in china, I went home with two major concepts on my heart:

1) that God is working while we sleep

2) that we are all missionaries.

After year three those two things are still huge in my heart.

I live my life for the gospel in China.

Do you live out of obedience or complacency?

Scripture tells us that there are certainly those who have been gifted with specific gifts and talents, but never does scripture ever indicate that some were called to “go and make disciples” (Matt 28:19) while others are to live contentedly where they’re comfortable.

God doesn’t sleep. He never sleeps. He is always at work. Always protecting. Always providing. Always was, always is, always will be by our sides. And always El Shaddai - powerful enough to take care of his children.

So even while you’re resting and recuperating from the struggles of life he’s still working. But have you ever stopped to consider what he’s doing? Ever asked? Have you ever considered how much more he would do if only his people would ask? (2 Chronicles 7:14)

We have all been called to be disciple-makers in our own little world’s – and that starts with prayer.

These are the things that Abba has been teaching and showing me this past year. He has given visions of lives changed for His glory, and broken relationships to be used to drive us closer to him. Most significantly, this year has been, I believe, a year of kind of commissioning for me. The call of God to lead others into His presence through music has never been more clearly spoken to me. God has pulled away from many of the distractions of life to cleanse and purify my heart, mind and life. Finally, this year was ended in my acceptance of His call to be where he called for whatever purpose he places me there – even when all I can do is pray.

My roommate and I recently moved into a new complex in a new neighborhood that He clearly told us to go. His intentions here are not fully known to us, but there is an assurance that His presence is even here and at work. We’re making friends and building relationships that allow for growth and revelation.

I have not been sent to China by the church to be a missionary, but I have been sent by God to be His ambassador. It’s terrifying to think on at times. It’s hard most of the time. In a conversation had with someone very dear to me, I was reminded that living in comfort and convenience (for me or for others) does not equate God’s direction and/or blessing. Things could be a lot easier and practical for me if I did them differently (ie, finishing my degree, getting married, speaking to people about God’s love), but Jesus said “if you love me, you’ll obey my commandments” and I’ve been commanded to China. I don’t know why. I don’t know how long. I do know that your prayers for me are endlessly blessing and encouraging. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.

Feel free to email with questions or comments! J

Perspective on Sacrifice (Just a Little)

I’ve been saved and redeemed for a while now. Close to 15 years. (I admit, it’s hard for me to believe that I’m even old enough to say that.) But it’s not until the last several months that the magnitude and significance of Jesus’ death on the cross really began to register in my heart and mind in a conscious, real-life kind of way.

I’ve been contemplating for a while now the concept of sacrifice.

When Jesus said that we must deny ourselves and take up a cross, he wasn’t glorifying martyrdom. Even if he were, he would have been preaching to the wrong crowd. No one there in his presence saw anything beautiful or glorious about a cross. When those crowds pictured the cross in their minds they saw shame, humiliation, punishment. The legalists would have probably seen the just reward to sinners. The hopeless would have seen fear and darkness. Jews probably saw Rome’s power and authority and felt their own insignificance.

This is what Jesus was preaching??

“…deny yourself and take up your cross…”

It gets better. Because there is a statement made before this that gives us the reason for such a humiliating and unappealing action…

“If anyone would come after me, you must…”

Sacrifice isn’t grand. It isn’t beautiful. It isn’t even merit-worthy.

Today’s Christian would say that those who “sacrifice” are something special, someone to look up to and respect, and I get that there’s a semi-valid foundation for that line of thinking, don’t get me wrong, but let’s not miss the true point. We have somehow managed to make something so horrid into a marketable perk.

A couple of weeks ago I started a new focus in my 5-year-old class – WWJD. As cliché as it may sound, it works for five year olds. :P I was having a talk with my class about things that Jesus did/does (a project we were about to start): he prayed, he forgives, he loves and he sacrifices. And I was telling the kids about sacrifice and how that relates to Jesus, I found myself fighting back tears over the magnitude of His love for me. At the same time, one of my students pipes up, “Ms. Raychel, I love Jesus.” To which I responded nonchalantly, with my back turned, “Me too. Sometimes it makes me cry.” Now, because I was completely wrapped up in controlling my own emotions I missed the significance of her little “Me too” response. But when I turned around to see a five year old in tears because of her love for her Savior, my heart was overwhelmed.

We look at what Jesus did for us and call it beautiful. And it was. The redemption that came from a God who loved His created, fallen world enough to allow His own son to die a humiliating, shameful death is worth all the praise and adoration we can muster up. But Christ was humiliated for me. He was shamed, degraded, belittled by choice, for me. And he calls me to do the same for him.

When I think about the life choices that I’ve made thus far, I often wonder, what sacrifices have I really made for God?

I live in a foreign country on the other side of the world, separated from friends and family who have supported and encouraged me through thick and thin, no matter how stupid  a decision may have seemed.

I’ve put aside dreams and aspirations of proving myself to the world as something special to follow the call that God has put on my heart to love on and help hurting souls in need of direction – and in the process have found the ultimate purpose and value.

And perhaps there are other, smaller, seemingly insignificant choices that have been made. And I don’t say any of this to toot my own horn. On the contrary not one of my decisions is any less than what Jesus said would have to happen to be His follower.

“If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross daily…” – Luke 9:23

I started this post off talking about the significance of Christ’s death on the cross. His blood covers a multitude of sins, it protects, it heals, it redeems, and so much more. It is a glorious thing, but certainly no small thing. I encourage you to take some time to contemplate the cross. It’s not just about eternity.

Perspective on Unbelief

Imagine an open ocean.
Wind blowing. Motors roaring. Bright yellow sun rising over the mountains into a perfectly blue sky in the distance. 

My heart sang, peace flooded, and joy, overwhelming joy came pouring out in song and prayers to my God who is so GREAT that he created all of this. 
A God more AWEsome than the awe inspired by what he fashioned with his words (Gen 1) and sustains in the palm of his hand (Isa 40). 
A God so much better than songs I can sing or words that I can string together.

Because the more that I get to know this God, the more that he reveals himself to me, the more I realize how GREAT He is and how little I am. 
And I don't say that to demean myself in any way, don't mistake me. I know that I have been "fearfully and wonderfully made" (Psa 139) with intention and purpose, and that he has a plan for me (Jer 29). But I am still the created. And as fabulous as this creation may be, the Creator himself is SOO much more. 

In this beautiful moment that I got to experience the fullness of joy in joining with all creation to sing praises to my King (Psa 96) while speedboating off the coast of an island in Thailand, I heard the Spirit speak a word that I specifically want to share with you:

"Unbelief does not mean that I am not there. It does not mean that I have no power."

 Did you get that???

God is SOO incredibly HUGE, so BIG, so POWERFUL that he can, and even wants to work in the darkest of places. The places that many of us look at and go, "those people have no hope, what's the point?" or "it's/he's/she's just so hard/stubborn…", those are the places that God still wants to redeem. 

I was looking at the coast of Thailand and thinking about the number of temples and idols that are everywhere in the country when He reminded me that he still wants to redeem this people. 
I was thinking of people in my life whom I have had a hard time believing would ever come to lay down their burdens at the foot of the cross when He reminded me that He's still strong enough to save.
And money….finances…He's got them covered too…if we'll let him.
I got to thinking about the stories I heard as a child about how fairies would die if no one believed in them and I realized… God is not a fairy!


I don't know what this means to you today. I don't know where you're at or what your facing, but I want to encourage you. 
God is bigger than unbelief and doubt. 
He is stronger and wiser than logic (1 Cor 2) and can conquer any fear (1 John 4). 

"The Lord, you God, is in your midst, a warrior who gives victory; he will rejoice over you with gladness, he will renew you in his love; he will exult over you with loud singing." Zeph 3:17